It’s 4 a.m. Do You Know Where Your Shoe Boxes Are?
A year or so ago, our church invested in one of those fancy little calling devices so Luke could send recorded messages out to the church peeps. It’s come in handy more than once to cancel services for bad weather or to alert people of special events or to give them an ever-loving heart attack when the ghost in the machine decides to call between the hours of 2 – 4 a.m. to remind them to bring their shoeboxes for Samaritan’s Purse.
Only us. This junk only happens to us. Doesn’t it?
Luke and I got a call at 4 a.m. Friday and for any of you in ministry, you know that a 4 a.m. phone call is NEVER good news. Luke ran through the house trying to find a phone. We always make sure all four of them are nowhere near the base because it’s so fun running through the house in the dark trying to guess where the ringing is coming from without breaking our necks. Truly fun. He answered and finally hushed me from repeating “who is it? what’s wrong?” to say, “It’s me calling.” Huh? When he told me that it was the phone tree I freaked. The reason I freaked is because we are the last people on the list so I knew that it had already called the entire church. Luke ran to the offices and jerked the thing out of the wall – about 2 hours too late. The reason for these random times is still a mystery because all the settings are programmed for 10 AM – 6 PM. Go figure.
To say we’ve been catching a little flack is a colossal understatement. Enough people have heard about The Call now that it has officially become a Town Incident. At the football game last night WHICH WAS A SCHOOL HISTORY-MAKING WIN I might add, at least 20 people wanted to know what the deelio and when I tried to explain to by-standers they would say, “Oh yeah, someone told me about that.”
(By the way, I can’t believe I just used the word deelio. All this smash mouth football has me feeling all edgy.)
We’ve even gotten mail about The Incident. One of our most precious, darlin’ church members whom I love with all my heart sent this note:
“I know I wear my ‘kerby frown’ in the choir sometimes and maybe even sometimes when you are preaching, but please…I don’t mean to. It’s just a part of me — My husband used to ask, “S., are you mad?” OH…I didn’t send you a card in October! Maybe that’s it? No? Hmmm… what could it be? What would make my sweet, adorable, cute little pastor wake up a peacefully sleeping little ole white haired lady in the middle of the night with the ringing of her phone?? I KNOW… You Love Me!! I love you too!”
There’s more to her letter but I want to be sure to include the part she said about me being the “best of the best wife” because it makes me happy. We adore you, S!!!
We are grateful everyone has been good-humored about the whole thing though we do know the alarm it caused. If anyone is ticked, well, all I can say is now you know how it feels to be a pastor who gets middle-of-the-night phone calls more than he lets on.
In the meantime, I’m thinking no one will forget their shoe boxes Sunday morning. {You’re welcome, Franklin Graham.} And if you don’t bring one, be warned.
You may just get another call from the pastor.
Hilarious! Those phone trees can be works of the devil. Been there……done that!
Sooo funny!!
Oh my goodness!
HILARIOUS! I’m laughing WITH you not AT you. Ok, maybe I’m laughing AT you just a little. ; )
I wondered when you used the word “dealio” if you were a Napoleaon Dynamite fan?
I love your sense of humor…comes in handy in ministry huh?
Sooo funny—-we had “a happening” onour call one the same night with weather alert. Thankfully OH thankfully it hit our Emergency List and our son happened to be the only one elegible to get the call—–bad part it called him every 15 minutes for over an hour before it was turned off—-at 11:00,oh if it had called the entire church. I would be in South America still running.
We were not charged, makes me wonder if callone was having a problem?
I loved the note that “S” wrote.
Cynthia..I LOVE Napoleon Dynamite but I had forgotten about Uncle Rico saying that!! hahahaha (It was him, wasn’t it?) Obviously it’s time for me to watch it again…
Hi Lisa,
It’s been a long time since you heard from me. I found your blog recently. This story is too funny!!!! I would love to stay in touch. Email me sometime.
Gay
Oh my, Lisa! That is so funny! What a blessing to have such a kind-hearted and understanding church family. I hope y’all get a ton of shoeboxes– we dropped ours off this past Friday.
You are too funny! I can honestly say we haven’t done that one…yet!
At least your little note was a sweet and gracious one and not like the “little ole white haired lady” who pulled me aside tonight and let me know that I “really need to learn how to shave the back of my husband’s neck”!!!!!!! And proceeded to give me a list of things I needed to do! And I forgot, before she went to take her place on her pew, she let me know it was time for the pastor’s wife to get up off the floor! ( I was sitting on the floor beside a pew with my 8 month old baby with he toys listening to choir practice.)
Oh. My. Stinkin. Word.
Do you ever wonder why these things always happen to you?
That is too funny. (And as a PK, I say you will never live this one down.)
And knowing your congregation just a little, I’d say you might need to watch your own phone at 4:00 AM the next few weeks. Things could get ugly.
Our church uses that phone tree thing. But, we haven’t been awakened in the middle of the night. Whew! But, it may be coming.
I know that at 4 a.m. they were all thinking about you…hopefully praying too.
Blessings~